May 11

Escarlata Maya

Summer is here, whether we like it or not.  And just to be clear, we don’t.

Fuck. This. Shit.

Really, the only sane thing to do is drink a lot of extremely tasty, refreshing cocktails.  This one certainly fits the bill… in fact it was hard not to drink myself into a coma with these while tweaking the recipe.

Escarlata Maya

  • 2 oz. Reposado Tequila (Siembra Azul)
  • 1 oz. Fresh Red Bell Pepper Juice
  • 1/2 oz. Fresh Lime Juice
  • 1/2 oz. Agave Nectar
  • Habenero Tincture
  • Club Soda
  • 1/4 oz. Del Maguey Crema de Mezcal

Combine tequila, red pepper juice, lime, and agave in a shaker with ice and shake until very cold.  Strain into a highball glass over ice.  Add habenero tincture to taste (2-8 drops was our range) and stir just a bit. Top with a splash of club soda and float Crema de Mezcal on top.  Garnish with a spear of red pepper and a wheel of lime.

Habenero tincture is easy to make… cover dried habeneros (cut up to prevent floaters) with pure grain alcohol for a week or two and strain.  Be very, VERY careful with this stuff… treat it like a chemical weapon.  It will have a lot of heat but also the wonderful citrus flavor for which habeneros are known.

Oh my god, between this and the Swamp Cooler (and the Badminton Cup) I may be able to survive another fucking summer in Texas.  Give it a try, tweak it if you must, and let us know what you think.

Feb 10

The Cavity Search

How does this cocktail make you feel?

You know when you are wandering, bleary-eyed, down a back alley in some godforsaken mid-sized industrial town, trying desperately to remember where you left your car when all of a sudden you feel that terrible urgency in your stomach that presages a bout of nasty projectile vomiting?  You drop to your knees and, one hand braced against the filthy, greasy side of a battered dumpster, you prepare to retch up the thin, burning liquid that is all that you have left to give and you ask yourself, “Why God, why?” as your diaphragm spasms and drool hangs from your lip like a strand of pure liquid despair.  At that exact moment you hear a furtive scrambling in the shadows and look to the side, barely able to turn your head, and you see two giant, fat raccoons fucking.

They notice you and pause and the male turns to look at you with a creepy preternatural intelligence glowing in his eyes.  There is a pause, all is quiet, your stomach clenches but seems to be waiting for something when the raccoon unexpectedly opens his mouth and asks “Hey, you wouldn’t happen to have a copy of Kierkegaard’s ‘Fear and Trembling’ on you, would you?”

Hope.  That’s what this cocktail feels like.  Pure hope.

The Cavity Search
A cocktail created in honor of Senor Amor’s recent humiliating and debilitating sinus surgery.

  • 1 oz. Gin (Plymouth)
  • 1 oz. Green Chartreuse
  • 1/2 oz. Lemon Juice
  • 1/2 oz. Bar Syrup

Shake and strain into chilled cocktail glass rinsed with absinthe.  Garnish with a maraschino cherry.