Aug 10

Swamp Cooler

swamp cooler

While waiting for the charcoal grill to get ready to cook an entire antelope and half of a bull, we needed a drink. We made this up based on the Silent Order cocktail. The measurements are all about the same, only we didn’t add any water because we were going to add club soda and serve it over ice. It was a refreshing way to pretend that the Texas sun isn’t a million freaking degrees.

The Swamp Cooler
2 oz green chartreuse
1/2 oz lime juice
7-10 basil leaves

Shake everything together over ice. Double strain into a glass of ice and top with club soda.

Drink it outdoors.

Jun 10


Silent But Delicious…

We at The Souse Report are all fond of cocktail virgin slut, and they recently added a post for a cocktail called the Silent Order. It caught my attention because it is heavy on the green chartreuse. I’m sure I can’t do better job of describing it than the folks over at cocktail virgin slut, so I won’t try. But I will say that this drink may be as good if not better than my current favorite Chartreuse cocktail, the last word. I wasn’t planning to post about this, and I drank it before I took a picture, so you can check out the glass that I used.

The Silent Order

2 oz Green Chartreuse
1/2 oz Lime Juice
1/2 oz Water
7-10 Basil Leaves

Shake over ice and double strain into a cocktail glass. (Double straining keeps the bits of basil leaves from polluting your drink.)

Feb 10

The Cavity Search

How does this cocktail make you feel?

You know when you are wandering, bleary-eyed, down a back alley in some godforsaken mid-sized industrial town, trying desperately to remember where you left your car when all of a sudden you feel that terrible urgency in your stomach that presages a bout of nasty projectile vomiting?  You drop to your knees and, one hand braced against the filthy, greasy side of a battered dumpster, you prepare to retch up the thin, burning liquid that is all that you have left to give and you ask yourself, “Why God, why?” as your diaphragm spasms and drool hangs from your lip like a strand of pure liquid despair.  At that exact moment you hear a furtive scrambling in the shadows and look to the side, barely able to turn your head, and you see two giant, fat raccoons fucking.

They notice you and pause and the male turns to look at you with a creepy preternatural intelligence glowing in his eyes.  There is a pause, all is quiet, your stomach clenches but seems to be waiting for something when the raccoon unexpectedly opens his mouth and asks “Hey, you wouldn’t happen to have a copy of Kierkegaard’s ‘Fear and Trembling’ on you, would you?”

Hope.  That’s what this cocktail feels like.  Pure hope.

The Cavity Search
A cocktail created in honor of Senor Amor’s recent humiliating and debilitating sinus surgery.

  • 1 oz. Gin (Plymouth)
  • 1 oz. Green Chartreuse
  • 1/2 oz. Lemon Juice
  • 1/2 oz. Bar Syrup

Shake and strain into chilled cocktail glass rinsed with absinthe.  Garnish with a maraschino cherry.